if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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