I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
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Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
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I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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