shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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