I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
