He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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