my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
worst night to have a conscience
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
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