During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
