Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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