So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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