Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
