This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
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