So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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