I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
