Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
