Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
