sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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