Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Please, let me fuck your mom
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize