So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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