she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize