I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Randomize
