I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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