let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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