He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Randomize
