he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
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