I will die if light touches me.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize