mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
