No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
