i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
