whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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