Having a random hookup so left but love u
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
