I wish I only lived at night.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
