is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
