she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
