Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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