Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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