I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I'm always down for nudity.
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