I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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