whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
