I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
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