with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
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Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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