Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
