Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
