I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
These 19 Sad People Chose Video Games Over Sex
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow