I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Damn victory sex feels great
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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