It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
i think i have two assholes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
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