They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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