4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
I skipped work to stalk him.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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