Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
The power of my boobs compel you
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize