I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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