all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
